5 Stages of Grief
by Masquerading with Shadows
Summary: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance. Set during Josh is Done.


_After the loss of someone important or loved, one will go through the five stages of grief. First is,_

**Denial**

_One will often find it hard to accept that they are gone and will act as if nothing has happened. _

Josh was done with him. He wasn't honestly sure about what that meant. From his limited understanding, it was like a syno-mim? cim? Synthesizer! Yeah, he honestly doesn't care that much. But, as he was saying, done was like another word for finished. But come on, he and Josh can't be finished. Or done. Yes, the girl that Drake made out with ten days ago-he can be finished with her. But that's easy-he gets bored and then deletes her number from his cell.

Simple.

But Josh, Josh can't do that to him. He can't be bored; his life was like the nightmare from Boring Town before he met Drake. Drake made it this rollercoaster-hey, remember the Demonator? So much fun!

_When grieving, memories will often resurface, reinforcing the feeling that _**nothing happened**_. Everything's ok._

Josh cannot stay angry for this long.

-

_The second stage is, _

**Anger**

_Fighting will often occur here. It may be anger at the person, a family member, or a close friend. Blaming will often occur. _

He has no idea (absolutely no fucking idea whatsoever) why the hell his guitar won't tune. It should only need just a little bit-_oh fuck it_!

And then the devil decides to walk through the door. As if his life isn't crappy enough-and no, that _isn't_ because of Josh. He fights the urge to yell at Megan as she starts yappin' about her whale. Blah blah blah-wait, she thinks that he misses Josh? Oh please!

"Josh needs me way more than I need him!"

Ah yes, here is now, ready to ask Drake if he wants to catch up and see _Just my Truck_ (_I'd like to run Megan over with a truck though, she's keeps on looking at me. Josh is just acting!_).

"Josh's life is nothing." And it has to be true. AND WHY THE HELL WON'T HIS GUITAR TUNE?! Oh well, he'll just sleep; he had a headache anyway. Probably from Megan's stupid whale sounds (if she hadn't been blasting them last week he wouldn't be in this mess anyway).

-

_The third stage is,_

**Bargaining**

_This often includes a replacement of some kind, or possibly compensation to fill the empty space that they may be feeling. They will try to bargain with people, do anything to get the person back. _

He's got eight phone numbers, made out with seven girls…and another he'd prefer to forget, seen three movies (his mum gave him more when he didn't move from his bed for three hours straight) with people, who he guesses would be friends and has asked every single person to just play one stinking game of ping pong with him. ONE GAME! And no, Callie or Cassie or Charlie, it isn't immature (_but you are_).

Ok, so, maybe today hasn't been his best day. But it wasn't his worst! …that's probably not something to be proud about. So, maybe he could be a little bit more responsible and stop blaming Josh and to not always expect him to help. Maybe if he proved to Josh that he could do that, Josh would acknowledge his existence. He wouldn't mind that.

But then he looks over at Josh, and he sees _him_ flirting with a girl.

Filthy Hypocrite.

So instead, he catches a sorta familiar face from school (and yes, yes it is a coincidence that he kinda looks like Josh), and then goes to see another movie.

-

_This is followed by,_

**Depression**

_Overwhelming emotions such as hopelessness, frustration and self-pity with occur. Mourning is also common. _

He just nearly got locked out of class, he has a zit (oh, something _is_ wrong) and now that-_Rokie_-is in his chair. He got…replaced. Replaced? Replaced.

Oh fuck.

And now, now Clayton?! God, this is all Josh's fault. Why the hell can't anyone except him see that? Why won't anyone let him explain? And now he has absolutely no idea what to do; Josh did it! Josh did everything! Josh was always there, Josh was always there to help, to get him out of trouble. Oh god, why can't he do anything? Since when was he dependant on Josh? Since when was he so _weak_ to need someone that he's always thought would _need him_.

And suddenly his arm is tingling and water is pelting down on him and it's burning him, and this is all Josh's fault, but really, he knows it's his. And it's that realisation that makes him want to get the hell out, because Josh _deserves_ to be rid of him. No longer his problem, no longer a responsibility, no longer a burden.

He needs to go.

"Drake, sit down!"

He's sick and tired of listening to people; doesn't matter what they do, it will be useless in the end. He's a lost cause.

The door's only a couple more steps, and then he can go. But still, there could be hope. Josh could actually care, could actually see him and not ignore him.

"Josh!"

"_What?"_ _What do you want? Why are you still here? Why don't you want me to be happy without you? _So he breaks.

Everything that he's been meaning to say, everything that he wasn't able to explain before finally comes out. He needs to everyone to understand, and he just fucking well needs Josh. A dim slither of hope is still there, that Josh will be able to make it ok and that he'll give him another chance. He'll do anything, he doesn't care. Josh, please, please understand.

But Josh still doesn't do anything, and his cracks are becoming more and more apparent. Why would Josh give him another chance? Hell, he stuffs everything up; including the thing that he thought was unbreakable.

"I'm sorry I'm probably the worst brother in the world." And most likely worst person. And he needs Josh to understand how sorry he is, and how much he needs him. But why would Josh ever want someone that weak?

The door gives a satisfying thud as he slams it, while his wet shoes slop sadly against the floor. He's lonely, he wants to hear shoes running after him, feel a brotherly hug to embrace him so he doesn't feel so cold. But he makes it all the way to the car without either one of those.

There's no hope now; no Josh.

-

_The fifth and final stage is,_

**Acceptance**

_When you realise that they're not coming back, and there's nothing you can do. _

He's got to get home. Back home, has to get away. He was wrong, he was wrong. He knows that now, and he's sorry. So sorry. Why didn't he realise? What could happen when he acted the way he did, how would it would affect his best friend. He lost his chance, he knows he did, he wasn't grateful enough, he was so selfish. He realises that now, and he regrets what he did.

Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Why didn't he think?

He slows down when he gets to his house, thinking clearly now that everything has stopped rushing and his emotions aren't clouding over his thoughts. And it feels better now, more bearable. He still feels guilty, still feels bad for what he did but still better. It may not be so bad after all.

He walks upstairs, devising a plan in his head. It pops into his head, and he grins at the thought.

"HOIYA!"

He sees Drake's face look up in surprise, his eyes a sad and dark. His face is still confused as he walks towards the ping pong table, almost refusing to let himself believe that he's here. He cuts him off, because currently, he's really only focusing on getting a grin to appear on Drake's depressed face. The image of him at Chemistry is burning his mind, and he can feel the guilt coming back, but then he sees Drake smile.

_It's all good. _

His life is a whole lot better than it has been these past two weeks; better than when the register five girl asked him out on a date, better than when he beet Helen at tennis, better than when his rash went away and even better than when he aced his Chemistry test.

He doesn't care that Drake is unbelievably irresponsible and has most likely had a bad effect on him, he doesn't care that Drake will most likely continue to abuse him, he doesn't care that he hated his ex-girlfriend (not that it matters because he will _never_ date Mindy again. I mean, it's not like he still has feeling for her…).

No, he'll accept Drake for who he is. Because he's not just irresponsible and reckless, he's also fun and outgoing. Drake may not be smart, but he's good with people and guitars and girls-all of which Josh isn't. They both have their strengths and weaknesses, but they still manage to accept each other.

Besides, Drake can't get that much worse. And Josh will go off to college soon anyway, and Drake will be able to take care of himself by then; he's full of promise and musical talent. He'll be fine on his own _(won't he?) _ They'll both be ok on their own; they proved that to each other.

Drake **needs** Josh, and Josh _accepts_ Drake.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I do not own Drake and Josh and are in no way associated with it. Review please? **


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